Dating Advice for Men- Attracting Tips, How to Talk to Girls

The Butabi brothers could be short on dry-humping options if they’re still spending their nights at the Roxbury. That’s because more people prefer to meet online, according to a survey of 2,000 people coordinated by social networking site Badoo.com.Focusing on the British singles, the results showed that 1 in 3 of us would rather meet online, compared to only 1 in 6 who prefer bars and parties, and 1 in 12 who prefer nightclubs.That doesn’t come as a big surprise as the taboo stigma of online dating has faded. Eight-four percent said they wouldn’t have a problem meeting someone in real life who they originally connected with online.With online dating, there are gains for both sexes, as neither has to shower, shave and get prettied up. There’s no cover charge, lineups or loud music to talk over, and there’s a
much better chance of filtering out shirtless morons and psycho types online.On a global scale, the Spanish lead the way, as 80% said they had met someone in person after talking online, followed by Brazilians (69.6%), French (70%), Italians (69%), and Americans (58.6%).

This question has been asked several times. The latest is from a guy who’s interested in a girl he sees at the gym.

Here’s another reader’s question:

How would you suggest approaching women that are COMPLETE strangers? In particular what if I’m walking along and I see an attractive woman also walking. I honestly have no idea how I would initiate the conversation because in my experience if I am alone and someone walks up to me and wants to start talking to me and I’ve never seen the person before, it makes me feel awkward because I automatically think “Why is this person talking me? What does this person want from me?”

Do I need to build rapport with her or is it enough to walk up to an attractive woman and just say, “Hi. I’m Philip. I saw you standing/sitting here and you look so beautiful that I want to take you out to dinner.”

Gentlemen, gentlemen. These are great concerns. Here’s what you do:

It’s enough to ask a stranger out without building rapport, but your chances of securing the date increase with more rapport. Otherwise, she is only saying yes to her attraction to you, not to possible charm and flirtation you could throw out. If you give some rapport, she could have more to go by to see if there is “chemistry.” I wouldn’t say, “Hi, I’m philip. I saw you standing/sitting here and you look so beautiful that I want to take you out to dinner.” Although that’s the truth, it sounds like you ONLY want to take her out because she’s beautiful… Does that make sense? Also, more conversation = more time. And More time= more trust. More trust= more likely she will say yes.

Just introduce yourself like this: “Hi, I’m Philip. What’s your name?”

And then it is always good to be apologetic because you are interrupting someone’s day and being apologetic shows humility. It also gets women to trust you sooner.

Say, “Sorry this might seem really forward but if I don’t say something to you right now, I know I’ll be hitting myself on the head thinking I just let such a beautiful woman pass me by and I may never see her again.”

Do you see how it’s complimenting her indirectly? It’s easier than a direct compliment because direct compliments sometimes have the unnecessary pressure for the recipient to respond. I have nothing against complimenting a woman though. I just think indirect ones are a great way to start things off if you’re feeling gun shy.

It also tells her you think she’s attractive without making it seem like it’s the only reason you want to take her out (even though at this point that is true, women want to feel like you want to “get to know them better.” If she thinks you are only going out with her cuz she’s pretty, that’s when she’ll question if you are only interested in a physical relationship)

If you don’t want to chit chat further as you’re probably going to be super nervous, you can say…

“I’ve gotta run but can I call you sometime?” And then if she says yes, just take out your phone and say, “425 area code?” to get the ball rolling.

And as you leave tell her to have a great day and tell her you will call her:)

if she says no, the exit strategy is to smile and say, “Well, I’m sorry for interrupting you. Enjoy the rest of your day.”

Ask many men about the key to a successful date and the most commonly cited myth is that the number one rule of seduction is to  “get ‘em real drunk”. Now while we’re not denying that alcohol can help romance blossom, the rules of internet dating are very different. Here’s why. Firstly, remember that you don’t actually know the person you’re meeting for the very first time. Sure, you might feel like you know them. You’ve seen pictures of them. You’ve messaged each other back and forth. But you don’t actually know them. So much subconscious human behaviour; how someone carries themselves, just how they seem as a person, you can only discover when you actually meet. So meeting someone for the first time in a bar is often at best, awkward, at worst, excruciatingly painful. You can fall into the trap of ‘interviewing‘ each other. And booze only makes things worse. We reckon the more you put into a date, the more you get out of it. And the most fun way of getting to know someone new is by doing something with them.
Here are some pointers.

Matt Janes is founder of DoingSomething.co.uk, the new dating site dedicated to making dating fun.

Creativity

What profession do women find most attractive in a man? Fireman? Nope. Doctor? Not really. A recent survey rated ‘artist’ as the most attractive career choice in a potential mate. So being creative is an attractive quality in a man. Use it to your advantage. Don’t be afraid to suggest something out of the ordinary.  Most people never spend any time exploring where they live and being a tourist in your own city is a great first date. Open top bus tours are a good start. Or if you live in the capital, check out London Duck Tours. Bright yellow (hence duck as in rubber) converted WW2 amphibious vehicles tour part by road then for the grand finale descend into the Thames. Top marks for originality.

Appropriateness

Another one that’s a cinch to get right if you think about it. Online dating is a
golden opportunity to find out what your prospective date does and doesn’t like. Then you won’t end up taking an opera lover to a night at the dogs or vice versa. Try not to be clumsy with your detective work; segue questions into conversation, rather than offering outright date ideas. Of course, if you’re on Doing Something, your life is made rather easier: look for the icons your date has picked as their interests, and take it from there. Women find attentive men irresistible. So men, pay attention.