Dating Advice for Men- Attracting Tips, How to Talk to Girls

Maintain eye contact

Avoiding eye contact makes you look shifty or painfully shy. Charismatic guys are confident and comfortable carrying on a conversation. So look others in the eye, especially women; they often list “eyes” as one of the most attractive male
characteristics. Why else do you think Paul Newman, with his glacier-blue eyes,
was considered a sex symbol for so many years?

Adjust your clothing to set the tone

When it comes to sending signals through your body language, we can all learn a lesson from the charismatic commander in chief. President Barack Obama is the most stylish president since Kennedy, and one thing he’s masterful at is adjusting his clothing to set the tone. When he’s speaking from behind a podium, he knows how to rock a suit; when he’s chatting with his constituents at a town hall meeting, he has his tie loosened and his sleeves rolled up. Whatever the occasion, he never looks out of place — never overdressed, never underdressed.

a body of success

Much like a picture, body language speaks a thousand words. If you want to be more successful with women, in your career and in social situations generally, start committing these body language lessons from charismatic men to memory.

Find a fun sport and stay active together:)

I think when men see their wives gain weight, they don’t know what to do. They feel helpless because the subject matter is so off-limits. It seems like there’s no right way to bring it up. So, in an effort to help husbands help their wives, I’ve written this article. As someone who has struggled with my weight my whole life, I know these things are helpful, and after talking to another friend of mine who also struggles with weight and food issues, I’ve decided that many women would appreciate this article as well.

1. If she looks like she’s eating a lot or binging, don’t call her out on it. That only makes her want to eat more.

• “Is there anything on your mind?” or

  “Is there anything you want to talk about, sweetie?”

Don’t tell her to eat slower or stop eating. Don’t tell her, “You shouldn’t be eating while you’re standing up or distracted by the tv!” And DONT tell her that muffin is going straight to her hips/butt/thighs. 

All you have to say are the six magical words that make women (most of the time) put down the fork and start talking:

A lot of the time talking about things is exactly the cure to emotional eating. Why? Because sometimes women don’t want to deal with what they’re feeling. Sometimes it’s even more complex, and we don’t even know what’s bothering us until we sit with someone and talk it out. I know that’s very strange to many men. Men usually know their problems and know exactly what to do to fix them, and that’s why when men usually make the decision to lose weight, they just do it. Women tend to yo-yo with their weight. It’s difficult because emotional eating and stress eating play a huge role. It’s not just a matter of thinking, “Oh I need to eat less and move more.” It’s a matter of thinking, “I need to stop running away from my emotions and stuffing it all down with food.”

2. Give her unconditional love

Nothing causes more change in a partner in a marriage or a relationship than creating an environment of unconditional love. If she knows you will be there no matter what and she knows that you see her beauty and also her great potential, she is more likely to change out of love for herself and for you instead of fear that you will leave or stop loving her, sticking around because you just feel a duty.

3. Do active things together

Evidence shows that having a fitness buddy helps people stick to their exercise routines. How much more if your partner is your spouse! Find activities you enjoy. Nate and I are going to start single tracking! I’m excited! We also do street hockey when the weather is good, and sometimes we play basketball, pickle ball, tennis, or just rollerblade. We also have done backpacking, hiking, biking, table tennis and kayaking.

4. Compliment her every day, especially compliments related to her appearance and her sexiness.

Before any changes are noticeable in her weight loss, focus on complimenting what she already has going for her naturally. “Your hair is so beautiful, touchable, and great smelling…” “Your skin is so soft and sexy…” “Your eyes…” and whatever body parts you love about her. You can also tell her how you love that she is so feminine, sexy or elegant.

5. NOTICE even the smallest changes in her body and encourage her with her progress.

When you are working towards a goal, any bit of encouragement helps propel you forward. It encourages you to keep going, especially if someone notices your progress. Every day, take time to just be attentive enough to notice her. When you see changes in her body, let her know! “Baby your legs look really toned!” Avoid making comments that make a comparison to the past. Instead of saying, “Your face looks slimmer,” you can say, “I love that you’re wearing your hair up more these days. It really shows off your beautiful face.”

6. Make aggressive and daily (if possible) sexual advances and never turn down her sexual advances.

She wants to be pursued. Every women wants to be pursued, not only while a man is trying to capture her at the beginning. She wants to be pursued forever. Your regular sexual advances make her feel wanted and desired. They make her feel like she’s still got it. They make her feel sexy and remind her daily that she has an audience and a man who wants to see her naked. One way to make a woman lazy about her figure is making sexual advances infrequent. If she knows she’s going to be seen naked on a regular basis, she’s less likely to “let herself go.” While she’s trying to lose weight, your sexual advances are like a pat on the back, encouraging her and letting her know she’s desirable. 

I also mention making “aggressive” sexual advances. What I mean by this is making your sexual advances feel more like “in the heat of the moment” and less like regular, monotonous, expected “married” sex. Have more “stranger” sex with your woman. “Married” sex starts in the bedroom. “Stranger” sex starts at the door while you’re trying to find your keys. “Married” sex is quiet and mindful of the kids next door. Hire a babysitter if you have to and have “stranger” sex… the kind where you are vocal and don’t care if the neighbors hear. “Married” sex is a slow unveiling of lingerie. “Stranger” sex is so intense you can’t move fast enough to take your clothes off. “Married” sex waits until you get to the bed. “Stranger” sex will pin you against the wall or on the floor just to have you then and there.

The point of mimicking “stranger” sex with your wife is to make her feel irresistible, like you can’t get enough of her and you can’t get her soon enough. This will fuel her confidence and make her feel so attractive and sexy.

Lastly, it’s important to never deny her when she makes sexual advances. Before Nate and I got married, we promised each other we would never deny each other when one of us makes a sexual advance. No matter what the reason, it will always feels like rejection, so we never do it. This ensures that we are always thinking of the other person first and in return we know we will also have our needs taken care of when we’re in the mood. Every time a person gets rejected sexually, the less they want to try again. By always willingly and enthusiastically accommodating your spouse’s sexual needs, you always make them feel wanted. If each partner only had sex when they wanted to, it would only be a selfish act.

7. Look at her daily. Even if you’re in a crowd or amongst family, she needs to feel your gaze and your attentiveness.

Give her the opposite feeling of being ignored. Treat her like you did when you were a suitor. Suitors are always sneaking glances at the women they are “eyeing.” Women want to know that you are still attracted to them and even if your woman has come to the point where she has gained so much weight that you don’t even recognize her or find her attractive, you have to fake it until she makes it. This is your loving gift to her. Your frequent loving gazes will fuel her progress. So many times men don’t even realize that their visual focus has shifted away from their mate. It’s a subtle shift, but one that women notice. Even if she is still your top priority, the less you look at her, the more she will feel ignored, and the less motivated she will be to make any changes. Why should she change if you don’t pay attention to her anyway?

These suggestions may seem insignificant, but I guarantee they will be helpful to your wife!

This isn’t going to be a Playboy instructional video on how to handle women too beautiful to exist in real life and how to make them respond in ways no one has ever heard of. The idea here is to turn you into a massage master Jedi, a relaxation guru if you will. That’s really what a good rubdown is — a way to relieve stress and channel positive energy through to the other person. Not only is it one of the best ways to signal to your partner that you’re ready to move to the next level physically, but it’s also a fantastic way to let her know how much you care. You’re probably familiar with specific types of massages. Shiatsu is an Eastern art that combines acupuncture with acupressure to allow the regulation of the energy flow. Rolfing is another medically oriented technique aimed at the straightening of the body, strongly resembling chiropractic. The best known, however, is the Swedish massage, which is pretty much what will be covered here. It’s a full body massage with relaxation as its goal. Other styles such as sports massage, reflexology, myotherapy, and myofascial release are also of a therapeutic nature.

Before you get started with a massage

The environment in which you intend to proceed should be carefully mulled over. It should be relaxing in most fundamental way. There shouldn’t be any children or pets around to interrupt. The room must be at a comfortable temperature and your woman shouldn’t be subjected to any drafts. Take the time to dim the lights and make sure the drapes are pulled shut so that there are no distractions. It’s not enough just to light a scented candle; make sure your environment is clean and uncluttered. Plan on summoning the music connoisseur within you and make a playlist of relaxing music. For relaxation’s sake, we prefer instrumental compositions. Think mellow jazz. Your woman should be comfortable with you; if she doesn’t feel completely at ease, then she won’t be able to fully let go. She should entirely disrobe once you assure her that her more intimate parts will be covered. It is possible to work around bra straps and panty lines but it should be avoided if possible.

Come to the massage equipped

She should lie down on a hard surface so that all her muscles are adequately supported: a firm mattress or a futon are ideal. Also, allow enough space for you to be able to circulate around her and work contentedly. Have towels on hand. Not only will you need some to cover her where the sun isn’t supposed to shine, but it is also important to cover the areas that you have already massaged so that the body heat you will have generated won’t escape and leave her chilly. A folded towel or a small pillow should be provided for her head.

Lubricants are a must. There are many fancy massage oils that are available on the market and they truly are the best option. They have just the right level of viscosity, and leave your woman smelling rather good if you buy the scented kinds. Water-based lubes, KY for example, and petroleum-based jelly like Vaseline, aren’t idyllic as they are absorbed too quickly by the skin.

If you don’t want to invest in massage oils, you can always use olive oil — that’s right, what you use in the kitchen. It works great, but its perfume may turn your woman off. If she doesn’t like the feel of oil on her skin, then you can always turn to talcum powder. It’s better than nothing at all.

roadmap to the stars

When you do get into the massage, you should always target large muscle groups. Neck, shoulders, back, and legs are what you should mostly work on. By not focusing on specific muscles, you avoid doing any damage and are relieving most of the stress.

Your pressure should be even and firm so that the “massagee” can get used to your touch without being distracted. Use your entire hand: fingers and palm, heel and fingertips. Your strokes must be graceful and poised as if you were sculpting clay with Demi Moore sitting between your legs.

For maximum effect, you’ll want to begin with the shoulders. From there you can work your way to her neck, and then down her arms all the way to her hands. After that you can return to her upper and lower back, and over to her buttocks if she has no problem with it. Then it’s down her thighs to her calves. You can end off with her feet. Once there, backtrack all the way to the starting point with a lighter touch of effleurage .

how the pros do it

Begin with softer movements:

Effleurage: Soft and fluid strokes steadily applied with the palm of the hand. It will stretch the soft tissue and is very relaxing. It’s a good way to help her body get used to your touch. Always use this technique before and after more energetic rubbing.

The fan stroke: Your hands should be at either side of the spine above her hips, with your fingers facing her head. Slide your hands up to her shoulder blades with a bit of pressure. Next, move up and out toward the shoulders in a curve, and move back down along the rib cage to your initial position. Basically, you’re drawing a coarse heart, which should classify you as quite the romantic.

The circling hands: Wax on, wax off for the nonviolent crowd. Your right hand should be perpendicular to her spine with your fingers pointing to her left. Make counterclockwise semicircular motion with your fingers always pointing in the same direction. Once you’ve gone a few inches, have your left hand seamlessly take over. And so on. Before long, you will have left-traced an entire circle.

Once her body is accustomed to your attention, you can move on to more vigorous actions:

Kneading: Ever given someone a back rub? Then you’re already accustomed to this method. It consists of rhythmically squeezing the flesh and muscles for approximately half a minute. Go slowly and don’t simply aim for the skin. Remember, it’s a massage, not a dungeon of pain.

Milking: Similar to kneading, only here you use both hands to grab onto a single muscle group and squeeze, alternating between your right and left hand. Imagine you are milking a cow, hence the name. Then roll the flesh between your fingers.

Here’s a great and fun way to bring this to a close:

Fingertips raking: Arch your hands so that only your fingertips apply pressure to her body, but first make sure that your fingernails aren’t potential weapons. Then, remember last fall and rake your heart out.

You can try all these techniques on different parts of her body. Experiment and pay attention to her reactions as you go.

don’t want get slapped, do you?

1- Never, ever apply pressure directly on the spine. It can be unpleasant and frankly, I would avoid any spots that can cause serious neurological damage.

2- Similarly, massaging the belly can be a source of discomfort for your woman.

3- Don’t pinch. It can be easy to succumb to it when kneading and milking, but you should avoid it.

4- And finally, once you start the massage, never leave your partner without your touch. If you need more oil, try doing so with only one hand so that the momentum is never broken.

the grand finale

When you’re done, use a spare towel and wipe the extra lubricant from her body. It will also signal to her that it’s over. Have something to drink close by, as people tend to be thirsty after a good rubdown. And take the time to discuss the great moment the two of you just shared.

Basically, keep it relaxing. If you are massaging a friend in the hopes of better, less lonesome days, don’t turn the event into a sexual one halfway through just because you have an opportunity. Let her make that decision — otherwise, chances are the only person you’ll be massaging is yourself.