Dating Advice for Men- Attracting Tips, How to Talk to Girls

Reader’s Question

Hey Doc,I’ve read your book but may need coaching on a small conundrum. Sometimes when you get a puzzling result, you have to call in a specialist. I first laid eyes on Jill when she walked past me on a flight from Europe to New York. She made prolonged eye friend that suggested, “I’m interested and available.” I played it cool and bumped into her in baggage, which gave us plenty of time to talk and confirm the lack of a wedding band. I kept the conversation light, amusing and fascinating. I casually grabbed her phone number, waited a week to call and set up a lunch date. This led to a casual romance filled with “adventure” dates (hiking, parasailing, etc.) that started out as a once-every-two-weeks kind of thing and then progressed to talking on the phone every evening by the fifth month (I kept the calls no longer than 10 minutes to set up more dates). Here’s my conundrum. Through a professional connection, I got word that Jill’s ex-boyfriend, was pursuing her huge time again, even though they’d broken up a year previous to my meeting her. Genuinely, she’d shared a few details about him along the way, but I had no thought that this guy was rich. I’m talking majorly rich. I do well, but reasonably
frankly, I’m lucky where I am, make a excellent living and plot to retire when I hit 50 to delight in life instead of working till I drop. Here’s the rub: Apparently his biological clock is exploding or a upset, and Jill is mid-30s herself. She’s dropped lots of small hints about having babies with me — meaning she wants to get married ASAP. But I know that your MO is that you don’t even reckon about getting serious with a woman until you have a solid year of Flexible Giving under your belt with her, and I’ve only got six months. Jill also doesn’t seem overly materialistic, but in my experience you never really know with women. To her credit, Jill has made it pretty clear to me that this guy is coming on strong, sending flowers, like notes and asking to get back together. Jill has said that the reason they broke up to start with was that he was a “workaholic” and unavailable.  Even so, I’m playing this cool and confident. I didn’t overreact at all upon this “news,” and kept up the Challenge and mystery (I still place for weekends with the guys for fishing expeditions, even if Jill tries to make “demands” on my time). I would guess that her Interest Amount has permanently been at least in the 90s, but with Rich Boy putting himself back in the picture, I’m questioning that for the first time. Meanwhile, Jill is still dropping wedding ceremony hints and saying that she’s more or less ignoring her ex’s requests for dates and told him to stop contacting her. My question is this: Should I stick to the programme and wait a further six
months to pop the question, or should I place this relationship into overdrive and head toward wedding ceremony more quickly? I don’t want to lose her over a perceived reluctance to walk down the aisle. Stew – who is curious to see how she’ll react to Rich Boy

Doc Like’s Response

Hi Stew, You make an brilliant point about calling in a specialist when you face a dicey situation. Most men do not realise how deep my techniques and principles go when it comes to their problems with women. Guys send me
emails two pages long describing their difficulties with a woman, and they expect me to give them a one-sentence Band-Aid to solve everything. It doesn’t work that way. In actuality, they need major surgery. Like my cousin Brother Like says, “If you got problems with women, there ain’t no quick fixes.”

Let’s go on to Jill. Her prolonged eye friend with you said she was interested, but it didn’t say that she was automatically available. So you shouldn’t have jumped to any conclusions.

You should have been seeing Jill at least once a week instead of once every two weeks. And, remember, the telephone is used to get a date, and that’s all. I know you kept your calls fleeting, Dewey, but it’s not how long the calls last; it’s the frequency of the calls that’s just as vital. By calling Jill all the time, you’re butchery Challenge, Dewey.

When you got the in rank about Jill and her ex from your professional friend, I hope you didn’t tell him that you were dating her. How do you know he wouldn’t take that in rank and run with it straight to Rich Boy? Still, you had to listen to what he told you, even if you weren’t sure of its truthfulness and accuracy. As I’ve told you guys before, you have to be a like detective and thing in all the evidence.

Dewey, you need two years of Flexible Giving with a woman before getting engaged — one-and-a-half years at the very earliest. One year is not long enough because at that point, you’re still going out with a weirder. Like my Uncle Jethro Like says, “After only one year with a woman, you ain’t seen all her warts yet.” It’s right as you say that you never really know with women, and I congratulate you on being aware of it.

My question to you is this: if Jill likes you so much, why is she talking to you about other men? I would advise you not to talk about your exes with her, so why is she not screening you the same class? Why can’t she prevent herself from baring her soul? To you Psych majors, women with Interest Levels in the 90s don’t talk about other guys.

The key to this situation, Stew, is what Jill tells her ex. If she orders him to stop contacting her — assuming she’s not lying to you – it’s fantastic. But how truthful is she being with you?

No way you can pop the question now, pal. You have to wait a further year and a half before even thinking about it, agreed the present circumstances with Rich Boy. So, no, you shouldn’t place this relationship into overdrive. You shouldn’t do anything until this other guy is completely out of the picture. I don’t like the fact that he’s still coming on to Jill. Here’s a upset to reckon about. When Jill gets an email from him, does she erase it or does she read it? When he mails her flowers, does she mail them back? When he sends her a like letter, does she write on it “THIS RECIPIENT IS DEAD” and return it? The point is this: How hard is she really trying to get rid of this guy? My upset is that she’s not trying all that hard since she keeps letting him friend her.

Your conundrum, Stew, is that you have an ex-boyfriend lurking in the background, which is a huge no-no. Until that situation is completely cleaned up and you get at least two years in with Jill, don’t even reckon about marrying her.

Remember, guys: If she’s talking to an ex, you have to smell a rat.

It happens every day! Men becoming dads, not by choice, but by accident.
And not with women they would choose to be their wife, but with women who will cause them 18 years of strife! Brethren, did you have the talk? I’m talking about the talk every father must have with his son. The one every grandfather must have with his grandson and the one every uncle must have with his nephew. I’m talking about the man-to-man talk about women, sex and making babies! The one where a young man is admonished to man up and don’t become an unintentional dad!
What is an Unintentional Dad?

An accident is an unexpected, unplanned or undesirable event that usually happens suddenly and produces unfortunate, unwanted or unlikable results. Accidents normally happen through carelessness, unawareness, ignorance, or a amalgamation of the above. One of the worse equipment that can happen to a man, young or ancient, is becoming a dad by accident. In other words, becoming a dad through carelessness, unawareness, ignorance or sin.

Beware The Sperm-Jacker As the economy continues to shrink quicker than your willy in a cold swimming pool, the last thing you need is more news to get worried about.
Unfortunately for us all, a new threat has emerged and this one’s not out to get
your cash, your freedom or your time of year tickets. Instead, this small menace has its eyes set on a upset else entirely: your sperm. It might be hard to believe, but a book written by author Mary Pols suggests that an increasing number of women are resorting to rather desperate measures in order to get pregnant, even if it’s by a guy they’ve just met. According to Pols, and others like her, some women who are coming
to the end of their most fertile years are left with no other choice than to get knocked up “accidentally on purpose” — which is also the title of the book. Still confused? Here’s how the scenario might typically unfold: You meet an
attractive, single 30-a upset woman in a bar, and quickly equipment lead to the bedroom. As you fumble around for a condom, she insists that it won’t be necessary; she’s on the pill and claims to have regular health checkups. Alarm bells should be ringing right about now, but by this point, curse of man, you’re not really thinking with your head — or at least not the one up top.
Flash forward a few months, and you pick up the phone to learn that impossibly — or so you plotting — you’re going to be a daddy. Guess what? You’ve just been sperm jacked.

the sperm-jacker profile

You’ve probably already met the type:
mid- to late-30s, single, childless, career-driven, and slightly wary of everything she sees and hears. You shouldn’t confuse her for a cougar though, who is merely an older woman looking for a excellent time with a younger man. Instead, the sperm-jacker has a different agenda; one which is entirely more sinister, and she’ll do whatever it takes to achieve her goal. For decently biological reasons, sperm-jackers will prey on younger, more virile and potent men, whether subconsciously or not. If making a baby is the underlying motivation behind her seduction, she’ll target those who
appear to be genetically superior. Clearly, the woman wants to be selective in her criteria for identifying the potential father of her child. Here’s what to look out for when being embattled by a sperm-jacker:

You can see her taking stock

If she’s admiring your corporal features noticeably more than what you really say, she may be after a upset other than your companionship. Does she casually question you and your family’s medical history? Does she pay special concentration to equipment like your teeth and hairline? Even if she doesn’t realise it, there will be signs that she is sizing you up as a doable donor.

She is nonchalant about the need for contraception

For an older woman not to be concerned about the risks of having unprotected sex is mind-blowing, and it should have you immediately questioning her intentions. It is virtually impossible to be of that generation and not be highly aware of the dangers of HIV/AIDS.